When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

When chemists die, they barium.

Friends are those rare people who ask how you are and then wait for the answer.

A joke is like sex – neither is any good if you don’t get it.

Trouble knocked on the door, heard a laugh and went away.

What you don’t know never hurts you; it’s what you suspect that causes all the trouble.

A person lost in their work has probably found their future.

A good laugh & a long sleep are the two best cures for anything.

Don’t fly into a rage unless you are prepared for a rough landing.

When you give until it hurts, it makes you feel good.