*OUT OF THE MOUTHS OF BABES*
TEACHER: Why are you late?
STUDENT: Class started before I got here.
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L
TEACHER:...
If at first you don’t succeed, don’t try Russian roulette.
Poise is looking like an owl after behaving like a jackass.
My kid is studying English – now he talks back with perfect diction.
If at first you don’t succeed, do it as she told you.
The grass...
The Killer's Shadow - John Douglas & Mark Olshaker.
John Douglas was the pioneer of criminal profiling in the FBI. This book is mostly about Joseph Paul Franklin, a serial killer (30+) who also bombed a few places. It describes the effectiveness of profiling in this case &...
*FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER*
8 years old. Hateful little bastard. Bites!
*FREE PUPPIES*
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.
*FREE PUPPIES*
Mother is a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd. Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.
*COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED*
Also 1 gay bull...
Two guys, one old, one young, are pushing their carts around Wal-Mart when they collide.
The old guy says to the young guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."
The young guy says,...
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
