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Witticisms

The hardest thing in life to learn is which bridge to cross and which to burn. Reputation is valuable, but character is priceless. Dumb questions are easier to handle than dumb mistakes. Make new friends, but keep the old ones; one is silver & the other is...

Cape Comedy

Quotes that make you think... Giving money and power to the government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys!   -- P.J. O'Rourke, Civil Libertarian Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it! If it keeps moving, regulate it! And...

Wacky Witticisms

When I bore people at parties, I think it’s their fault. People who are always making allowances for themselves soon go bankrupt. Don’t just spend time, invest it. The world is like a mirror: reflecting what you do, and if your face is smiling, it smiles right...

Cape Comedy

Girl: 'When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.' Boy:  'It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles.' Girl:  'Well, that’s because we aren't married yet.'  ************************************ A newly married man asked his wife, 'Would you have married...

Cape Comedy

You know you're a redneck when......  You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.  You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.  Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.  You burn your yard rather...

Cape Comedy

An attractive blonde from Cork, Ireland, arrived at the casino.  She seemed a little intoxicated and bet twenty thousand dollars in a single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude."  With that,...

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